Bill Wooge is one of the most prolific volunteers in the history of Food & Friends. He has been delivering every weekend for more than 30 years, first in an old Ford Probe, then a Saab, and today in a black Mustang Mach-E GT. His community service in the D.C. region is remarkable and includes time on the Board of Directors of 1 in 10, the D.C. LGBT arts organization that produces Reel Affirmations. This story retraces Bill’s journey and recounts an unforgettable friendship he made with an individual on his delivery route.
When I began volunteering at Food & Friends 30 years ago, we were in the basement of the Westminster Presbyterian Church in Southwest, D.C. When you arrived, you would pack your own bags, then leave to deliver the meals. Back then, we did not differentiate between meal plans. Most people we delivered to would get the same thing.
I do not even believe Food & Friends had to pay rent in the building. There was a staff of between 5 and 10. Back then, I would deliver on Saturday and Sunday, and others would deliver on Monday and Tuesday. We provided a hot meal every day of the week except for Saturday, and on that day, we would deliver a cold dish and nice sandwiches for the next day.
Food & Friends was primarily serving the gay community. In a humorous way, I would also say that the meals also reflected the gay community. I would look at them and think to myself – ‘wow, tarragon shrimp!?’ They had high end chefs like David Hagedorn and lots of fancy dishes; there were these beautiful lemon bars. They would make extras to give to the delivery volunteers. To this day, I cannot eat another lemon bar. But as the organization grew, the meals became more organized and democratized.
I would say Food & Friends grew from people who cared — to professional people who cared. The diets became scientific, and medically tailored. The focus shifted to the bigger picture of the promotion of health and the treatment of life-challenging illnesses. But if I had a time machine, it would be fun to go back to the beginning.
The meals today may not appear as exciting as they once were, but they serve a bigger purpose. Delivering for Food & Friends made me more grateful for what I have. It also showed me a broad continuum of the way people live and access things. If you are interested in helping make social changes in communities other than your own, it is a wonderful place to do that. My grandmother always told me this: “no matter where you go, act like you belong and you will.” A lot of the interactions are a simple knock on the door, a friendly greeting, a smile, and you get back to your car. But there are a small percentage of interactions that for me, changed my life. I will tell you about one.
I am thinking of my close friend Andrew who I met when I was delivering him meals from Food & Friends. We became friends little by little as I was delivering to him. One day we just started hanging out together. We would walk down 17th street, and he was such a character that everyone knew him. You know how they say that the light draws all the gnats and flies? Andrew was like that. He drew a lot of people around him who were super smart and funny. We would spend time in Dupont Circle, which is not the way it used to be. I moved here in 1976. The city has changed so much.
He lived in one of those ornate old apartment buildings in downtown D.C. It was the most amazing apartment I have ever seen. The whole thing looked like trompe l’oeil, the illusionist painting technique. He had done up his entire apartment in the style of trompe l’oeil. He was something out of a book you would never believe if you were reading it.
After I had been delivering for a while, I would make his delivery my last of the day, and he would invite me in for coffee and we would sit and chat. Andrew was South African and from a well-off family. His parents were happy to have him out of the country because he was so wild. He loved to travel, and to this day is one of the smartest, funniest people I ever met and utterly unique. I have an international background because I was an exchange student and Andrew was well-traveled, so we had a lot to talk about.
I later met his ex-boyfriend, David, and we also became friends. David and I eventually became his caregivers. We were always bouncing off each other at the door as we came to see him when he was sick. We were the bedrock of his life. One day, Andrew started telling David and I all about South Africa, and I told him I was jealous. So, he said, “Bill, why don’t you come?” and I agreed. We all rented a beautiful little house on Signal Hill in Cape Town and had an unforgettable adventure.
In loving memory of Andrew Short. Photo courtesy of Bill Wooge.
When Andrew first got seriously ill, I visited him in the hospital. Then, the retroviral drugs came out, and he got better. So much so, that he would tell joke that he was no longer an AIDS patient, but a cancer patient, because HIV had spurred on some cancers, but his viral levels were minimal. He had really suffered from Kaposi sarcoma, and all types of cancers. He was in the National Institutes of Health (NIH) program for long term AIDS survivors. He suffered for many years. I started delivering to him in ’92 and he passed away in ’01, so nine years. He was one of the best friends I have ever had, and I miss him.
As I reflect, I remember how amazing it was to see the organization develop their dietary plans. When AZT first came out you needed a high fat diet to be able to absorb the medication. That was when they started to develop the specialized meal plans, and it was incredible to see the impact they had. Before the antivirals came around, HIV was a death sentence, and I had tons of clients who died. But it is easier to deal with loss knowing that we made a difference. At least we put a finger on the positive side.
Food & Friends is woven into the fabric of my life, and it has been exciting to watch it evolve. In 2001, I accepted a national award from the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) for being an “unsung hero” for my volunteer service at Food & Friends. I even remember when I first met Carrie Stoltzfus (now Executive Director) and I told her she was going to end up running the place someday. She is a good administrator, highly organized, and has a good natural energy and great people skills.
I would encourage people who move to the city who are lonely or want to get out and do meal prep at Food & Friends. You never know, the connections you make may lead to the next connection. I have seen what we do at Food & Friends have a real concrete change and improvement in people’s lives.
I have gotten more out of it than I ever put into it. Doing volunteer service at Food & Friends has been a blessing in my life. I am not quitting.
At Food & Friends, volunteers are core to our mission and our model of compassionate community service. Sign up to volunteer today, someday, you may be the next Bill Wooge!
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