Bobby Francis, Client
Rhonda Walker has many good memories of her dad, Bobby. When she shares her memories, she talks about the two things he was very proud of: his CB radio and his career with DC Metro. Bobby worked for almost 30 years as a bus driver who navigated the busy Georgia Avenue route. He was popular and well-known to his regular riders. Rhonda recalls, “He loved Metro like it was his life. His CB radio was his other pride and joy. He talked on it daily. He loved to hear his name; ‘Roll’n Flame’ called by other CBer’s.”
Even though Rhonda has many good memories their story didn’t start out strong. Bobby’s presence wasn’t steady in Rhonda’s young life, “I didn't grow up with my dad, he and my mom divorced when I was three.” But Rhonda was always on Bobby’s mind, “Everybody on the bus line knew me because he’d say, ‘Every September 28, that's [Rhonda’s] birthday.’ He would stop along his bus route to call me.”
Rhonda connected with her dad about 20 years later when she reached out and asked him to be in her wedding, “When I was getting married, I called him and asked, ‘As my dad, do you want to walk me down the aisle?’ He was like, ‘What? Absolutely I’ll do it.’” Shortly after that, Bobby lost his wife, so Rhonda insisted he move in with her and her family, “Often he would share that he was sad about the choices he made which caused him to be out of my life when I was young.” However, when Bobby moved in, he was able to make up for the time he’d lost with Rhonda and have an active role in his grandsons’ lives.
A few years later, in a reversal of roles, Rhonda would become Bobby’s caretaker. Bobby was forced to medically retire from the DC Metro when doctors discovered multiple myeloma, a blood cancer that develops in the bone marrow, in his legs. Doctors had traced the cancer to Bobby’s time as a Marine in Vietnam, where he was exposed to Agent Orange, a toxic chemical weapon used by the US Military.
After enlisting Bobby had attended training at Marine Corps Base Quantico in Virginia – where Rhonda says he was first exposed to dangerous chemicals. “It was in the water at Quantico base,” explained Rhonda, “I agree he got multiple myeloma from the war. It's documented in his records.”
“When my dad really got sick, it was okay, because I was living there. So, I cooked for him,” but care became complicated as the cancer medications damaged Bobby’s vision causing him to lose his driver’s license. When Rhonda moved out, Bobby was reluctant to ask for help. He hadn’t learned how to cook as a child, and his wife’s delicious Southern cooking had given him little incentive to learn as an adult. Rhonda watched Bobby struggle, often neglecting meals, “I said, how are we going to get food there daily? What are we going to do?”
It was clear that Bobby needed extra support, “That's when his social worker at the VA got [Food & Friends] in place." She told Rhonda, "You don't have to do this alone.” The regular meal deliveries were a lifeline to Bobby, “I think the nutrition helped him to stay healthy. If you guys wouldn't have delivered the food, he wouldn't eat - he didn't always eat three times a day.”
At first, Bobby was skeptical of the nutritionally tailored meals, “He's from down South - everything is seasoned well.” Rhonda remembers, “My stepmother cooked very well. She always cooked big meals and they were always well seasoned.” She brought Bobby around to Food & Friends’ healthy meal options with a sprinkling of extra seasonings.
Bobby continued to adapt to his new circumstances. Thankfully Food & Friends delivered meals for years. As Bobby’s needs changed Rhonda was very grateful how willing the staff was to work with her to change the meal selections. “With multiple myeloma, the medicine that they give you can weaken your jaw. Your teeth fall out. He couldn't eat hard stuff. I was able to call and say, 'Please don't send any more pears, peanuts, and apples.’ They quickly adjusted his meals."
With his nutrition taken care of, Bobby was able to focus on family, “He was good, he became a great dad and granddad. My dad got to be with his grandkids and my kids got to learn from their granddad.” Rhonda is grateful for the extra time she and her kids had with Bobby, “I got to learn how to dig holes, change toilets, hang ceiling fans, and my boys got to see how a man should treat a lady.”
Rhonda uses her story as a reminder to everyone, “If someone wants to have a second chance, try to find it in your heart to forgive. I ask my boys, what if we hadn't given Granddad a second chance? You know, you guys wouldn't have gotten to see what a good person Granddad was.”
Bobby passed away in 2022, but Rhonda remembers the support he found at Food & Friends, “My dad was so giving. If he would have had the opportunity to come here, he would say, ‘continue to help those who can't help themselves, like I was.’”
Today, Rhonda Walker is a member of Food & Friends' Leadership Circle Giving Society. She is a successful human resources leader in the federal government and a cancer survivor herself. Food & Friends supports the health and well-being of individuals living with serious illnesses, as well as their families and communities, by delivering nutritious meals, fresh groceries, and nutritional counseling to neighbors in need.